Friday, June 27, 2008

Should I hate him?

The King of Dan Snyder Haters, Dave McKenna has written a blog about yours truly.

My first thought was, lets take it to the blog.

My second thought was, lets take it to the street.

But after careful consideration, he and I share the same hatred for Extremeskins and the retards that post on it.

So I can't hate him after all.

But the Mayor has a message for you Dave.

You ain't no daisy.

A sit down with The President of the DTC

One of the 3 co-founders of the Dead Tree Crew, a pillar of the Redskins tailgating community, my partner in crime, and just an all around awesome person, I sit down with the President of the DTC and ask the questions everyone wants the answers to.

Why do they call you the President?

First Mayor, I would like to thank you for taking time out of your busy day to provide this insight to our fans.

Why am I the President? Well simply because I run shit. Where ever I got it's my show, when I show up I am now in charge!

What’s up with the bullet proof vest?

Well as you well know there is no Vice President of the DTC, therefore I can’t have some Eagle fan assassinate your boy. But in case anything ever goes down you know I have my dog tags on as well.

How many people over the age of 60 have you punched in the face? Why?

Well I can’t say that they were over 60, just like I don’t check ID when hooking up with some young bitch, I don’t check ID when I punch old people in the face, but I have definitely punched a hand full of old people in my life time. Oh and why you ask? Well old people need to be put in line too.

You have an obvious penchant for thievery, name some things you have taken without permission.

Well many fathers would say I stole their daughter’s virginity, but what the fuck do they know. Other than that you can always see the Moss Rd. street sign at our DTC Tailgates, and that doesn’t belong to me, hell I don’t even live on that street. Oh and I can’t forget the numerous golf carts that have been taking for a joy ride as well.

Last season you knocked out an Eagle fan inside the stadium, then threw his girlfriend down the ramp. Is that your all time favorite stadium moment? What is?

Thinking about the Eagle fan dropping like a sack of potatoes always brings a smile to my face, but that is not my favorite. A few years back the Skins were playing the Giants. I arrived at my seat right at kick off. At this time the G-men got off a pretty good kick return. A Giant fan behind me was celebrating as if it was Super Bowl 25 and Scott Norwood just missed the kick wide right. I informed the gentlemen that it was a long game; the giants had the ball at their own 40 and to take it down a notch. I am unable to recall his words at this time but he certainly challenged my authority, but before I could get a word in edge wise he pointed out his son was with him and I need to be respectful. I told him one more outburst like he had earlier I would come over there and use his son as a bat and beat him with his own son. Minutes later Fed-Ex Field Security asked me to get up out of my seat and come with them. We walked in to the corridor and they told me I could be thrown out for acting up. I assured them they would be no more problems. As I returned to my seat, the two female friends I was with were relieved to see I was not thrown out, but informed me that the Giant fan was talking shit after they took me out. I still kept my cool, until the Giants were punting and it was some what quiet in our section, this guy called me "boy" and then asked what security had to say. I told him “they told me to tell you to shut the fuck up”. At this point my fellow Redskins fans also began to give him a verbal lashing. I guess his son learned who really runs shit…me.

You have been anointed a Certified Level 10 Gangster. Care to explain?

In all honesty, there is no explanation needed. Real recognizes real. If you too are as gangster as us then you will know what the fuck I am talking about. Certified Level 10 Gangster sure has a great ring to it though!

Every season, you seem to “kick it up a notch”, What’s in store for this season?

Well there are always additions but at this point there is not too much that I can reveal. Some of our best moves are made last minute, so I am sure we will think of things in the weeks leading up the season, and I don’t want to spoil the surprise either, but rest assured, new rap tracks, new color schemes for the cone, new banners will all make an appearance at F-51 this season.

And last question. Denim or mesh?

Oh, I’m a denim guy, but my favorite shorts to date are the burgundy velour shorts I wore a few years ago. Those were fucking gangster.

If you are dying to know more about The President, check out his MySpace page, or e-mail him at

Wednesday, June 25, 2008

Chris Cooley has made some enemies

I guess when you a 20 something millionaire, a Pro Bowl Tight End, and just married a cheerleader, haters are going to pop up left and right.

NFL Juice, a blog that gets less hits than mine seems to be leading this hater revolution.

Never heard of NFL Juice? Join the club.

At first glance, its a definite knock off of KSK. But at second glance, they seem to be selling t-shirts as well. In case he didn't know, the Mottram Brothers run the T-shirt racket in this town.

After my third and last glance, the author is a total douche bag. I get it. You hate Chris Cooley because he is better than you in ever category.

And that includes blogging.

Tuesday, June 24, 2008

Santa Claus moved to Leesburg

Meet Merton Albert Meade. He just moved down the street from me. And when I say moved, I probably should specify.

Mr. Meade is a registered sex offender. With 10 seperate counts of Indecent Liberties with Children "Mert", is sitting in the brand new jail in Leesburg.

If I had to guess, I would say this gentleman used a Santa Claus suit to trick kids in sucking on his flesh colored candy cane.

For the record, I hate sex offenders. I have had one fired from my work last week, now I search this site daily. Colt Brennan watch out!

Bonus sex offender pic, just because this guy should be on the cover of Sex Offender Illustrated.


I really could do this all day, but I promise this is the last one. The next time your're in Fairfax City, stop by the local Panera, and make sure you meet Sugarfoot Smith.

Tuesday, June 3, 2008

I think they like us

There is no offseason for the DTC, thus there is no offseason for the haters of the DTC.


Probably the greatest picture taken of the DTC Captains, and probably the greatest Photoshop of the DTC Captains. I think it is safe to say, "Jacs" stands for jacks off, because anyone that spends that much time photoshopping the DTC, cannot possibly have ever seen a vagina in person.

More "masterpieces" after the jump


This picture is awesome. The only thing that could make it more awesome, is if I was wearing that red, white, and blue glitter suite myself, and Richard Simmons was wearing the Presidents bullet proof vest.

And I will end it with my all time favorite. A combination of a Redskins victory in Philly, the resurgance of Hit a Motherfucking Eagle fan, and Dan Steinberg visiting us for the first time brought out the best in Philly!


DEAD TREE GROUP??!!! saw ZERO Eagle fans step on F-51 pavement. One Eagle fan disputes this claim however.